I come again and pee twice. Then I come one lasta time.”“You foul-mouthed swine,” retorted the lady indignantly. “In this country we don’t talk about our sex lives in public!”“Hey, coola down lady,” said the man. “Who talkin’ abouta sexa? I’m a justa tellin’ my frienda how to spella ‘Mississippi’.”I went out dressed like a chicken last night... ... and I met a girl who was dressed like an egg. One thing led to another and the lifelong question was answered: it was the chicken.What’s a 6.9?Another good thing screwed up by a period.What’s the difference between your dick and a bonus check?Someone’s always willing to blow your bonus.Two deer were leaving a gay bar...One turned to the other and said, “Man, I can’t believe I blew thirty bucks in there!”What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?A man will actually search for a golf ball.What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?You can unscrew a lightbulb.What does the sign on an out-of-business brothel. Please marry me. I’ll be a good wife. I won’t give you any problems,’ she pleaded. ‘You will have to be content with being my daughter. I have grown to love you, too but I have a wife that I love and she’ll love you too.’ He called his wife and told her of his scheme. She couldn’t have been happier. ‘When will she be here?’ she asked. ‘As soon as I can get all this miserable paperwork done. We’ll be at Clark in the P.I. I’ll let you know more when I know more. I love you honey.’ The next day Captain Wilson and the little girl got on a C-141 and headed for Clark. The girl was completely dazzled by the life style of the Americans. She had never seen such luxuries. The thing that amazed her most was the way they took it all for granted. I’ll bet America won’t be this grand, she thought. It took the captain three weeks of his leave to get all of her paperwork squared away and even then there would be more in the States. They were checked in to the Filipinas Hotel in downtown Manila. He.
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